Resist replying immediately

Your best responses are rarely off the bat

On an average work day, how often do you find yourself in the middle of actioning a task on your to-do list when suddenly you receive a DM from a team mate asking you a seemingly urgent question?

In that split-second after you have been interrupted you have a choice to make.

You can either:

1. Stop what you’re doing and reply, (perhaps with a sense of impatience, frustration and annoyance filtering the tone with which you speak BUT saving you the effort of having yet-another-thing-to-do later), or…
   

2. You can carry on with what you were doing and reply when the time is right for you based on your current priorities and deliverables

Are you more likely to choose option 1 or option 2?

How can you make option 2 your default habit?

Most of the bias and discrimination employees face at work is subtle and implicit. But added up over years of a career, unkind words and actions from colleagues can feel like death by a thousand cuts, causing irreparable damage to one’s confidence and self-worth.

When I started reading about micro-aggressions I was horrified to learn that I had been unintentionally causing team mates to feel diminished due to my lack of awareness of my biases, and due to my tendency to reply - when interrupted from my work flow - with terse responses.

Now I do myself - and my teammates - a favour by not responding immediately unless the situation critically requires it. Here are some ways I resist the urge to respond immediately so that I can always communicate with compassion.

• Put ALL your devices on do not disturb mode when you’re doing important, priority work. This created a physical boundary to protect your focus and time.
  

• Consider having fixed-and-limited time slots for checking internal messaging services like Slack e.g. Only checking (1) first thing in the morn (2) mid afternoon so you don’t feel irritated by individual messages that distract from deep work.
  

• Draft replies to messages that create an emotional reaction. Has Karen asked you the same question for the millionth time? Instead of replying vexed, take a beat and draft your reply. Apply a lens of compassion: is there a risk this response could create a negative reaction? If so, re-draft.

Thanks for reading, jump onto Twitter & share your reflections with me @abadesi